Depression - Being Assertive

Good morning !

What is assertiveness?
Assertive is...saying no without saying "no".
It is standing up, for ourselves and defending our opinions and rights.

As far as I am concerned, being assertive is NOT the same as being rude or agressive.
It takes tact and expertise to know the right occasions / oportunities
To make use of Assertiveness.

"We are not born Being assertive, already. We learn it..."

Remember that you will not be assertive at once.
It requires time!


Why is it important?
Because sometimes we need to stand for our opinions and gain control over our lives ;
We cannot always allow people to take advantage nor use us.
By using Assertiveness you will feel less stress and, therefore, raise your self esteem
Along with point three, you will be able to give out your opinion.

With this technique, we can fight Depression 
and other problems or symptoms such as anxiety, insecurity,
lack of self confidence and poor relationships.
Situations of avoidance and frustration can be diminished as well.


Points to keep in mind : 

+ Body language is important too as it is needed for it to match the atitude.

+ You need to be serious yet pleasant.

+ Focus on what matters and on the problems.

+

• Use "I" statements. Keep the focus on the problem you're having, not on accusing or blaming the other person. Example: "I'd like to be able to tell my stories without interruption." instead of "You're always interrupting my stories!"

• Use facts, not judgments. Example: "Your punctuation needs work and your formatting is inconsistent" instead of "This is sloppy work." or "Did you know that shirt has some spots?" instead of "You're not going out looking like THAT, are you?"

• Express ownership of your thoughts, feeling, and opinions. Example: "I get angry when he breaks his promises." instead of "He makes me angry." or "I believe the best policy is to…" instead of "The only sensible thing is to …"

• Make clear, direct, requests. Don't invite the person to say no. Example: "Will you please ... ?" instead of "Would you mind … ?" or "Why don't you … ?"

Sources : http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/assertive/SR00042

http://www.uiowa.edu/ucs/asertcom.shtml