sábado, 4 de dezembro de 2010

Broken Heart

For every person, boy and girl who suffers about love.
Love isn't a game, nor a joke.
It should be taken seriously as hearts go hurt...

There is no magic potion to cure broken hearts,
I know it's hard, very hard to the point it can take over
Or mess up with people's lives.

Now I shall write from my point of view,
From...a girl's point of view.
I don't know if somebody can get disturbed or annoyed
With what I'm writting. I'm really releasing much
Of what I've been in this short life...
So, please, respect it. I hope this can help, too

I've been through that, I can relate to that...
Because i've been in such situations...
And I know not all people are assholes or bitches.
But some just are... >.<

My example?
I've been with a person 11 months...a lot of stuff happened,...
From lots of argues and fights, to loving moments,
To two rings in my fingers, and proposal.
Promises and all that pretty stuff...
I'll set the datas here :
02/06/2008 - 11/05/2009

Yes...we broke up.
In fact he was the one to do so.
The day he did such thing was three days before my birthday
How..."cool" is that? (NOT!)

I still remember as once
He was taking me to my grandparents home.
That was usual about him. A friday, lunch time...

He told me that day if something happened
That he hoped
"I would find someone else
To make me happier that he once did
To there for me more than he once did" ...

I guess that is what everyone tells.
I just answered to him
"Why are you telling me that?
You know I don't want anybody else,
And that you make me happy."

I started to slowly (or not) breaking down in front of him
I just started hugging him.
His expression was still serious and...
He hugged me back. I was home...

Saturday and Sunday...
I had more breakdowns during those days...
In the 8th of May he dropped the news
That he was going away to another school...
I should have known...
(I shall leave more in another post)

Point one. Me and him weren't perfect.
That is something that the person who is broken
Should see. In this case, me...

The fact is that...
At first thinking about that person hurts a lot
But with time, things slowly start to fade.
In the first weeks, I began to isolate myself
Crying, in my room. Or sleeping more than usual
I thought that that would be helpful.
But it's wrong...

In this times, the best thing is to go out with friends.
Drop the memories if they're harmful for you
Avoid the loving songs that turned out to be songs with sorrow
The best is too, to change the way you see things

It wasn't my blame - as a relationship isn't made by only one person.
To build something - 2 persons are needed.
Boy and Girl or in other cases, you know...
But in my case. He ended. He told me...

3 years in another school
I told him I would God knows how I would wait
But he didn't wanted that. So he went on with his life.
This was a test... And I wasted 11 months of my life
With someone who just left me. (I'm being ironic)
I hated him at first...it pained me lots...
But then, hate was good for a recovery
And not seeing him as well, it helped.
And meeting people too.

I just thought to myself how he'll regret of
Leaving me behind.
I mean, I never lied to him
Never cheated.
And I was the girl he was more time with
And the one who supported him to go to class and all
Otherwise, he wouldn't make it through school
(He was the guy with a girl in one week or so...)
And he never said much, not even a thank you.

With this I realized how I sacrificed myself and time
For someone who didn't appreciated much
Much of the times he said he would go out and me
Then said that he couldn't because of this or that...
I know it's awful to think like this.

But it goes more or less like this...
Hating -> Thinking -> Moving On
-> Learning to Forgive -> LIVING -> Loving.

Yep. I forgave and forgive him...but it takes time.
I don't know if me
And him would ever be friends...
I think not. He never spoke to me since.
He followed his path, I just can't force anyone to be with me
So...I let him go. And followed my own path.

It takes wisdom for one to be alone.
And during the time you're alone.
Don't be depressed.

Sugestions :
* Listening to music
* Going to the movies with friends
* Doing something you like
* Or any project you were planning on doing before
(I carried on with my book project)
* Partying
p.s.: With limits,
Trying not to follow addictive or harmful stuff/paths.

You can still enjoy life while you're alone.
You don't need a boy or girl to be fully happy.
I cried, and more stuff.
But there was nothing wrong with me.
It was the choice that he made.

I couldn't let him be with me
If he wanted to build his own future.
Or even if he goes search for his own path to be happy
If so, I'll search for mine. =]
And succeed. No negative thoughts.

* This was dedicated for a person
Whose name I shall not reveal here.
Plus it has lots of time already
Take care *

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